The Best You Tube Video Ever...

Ummmm....



Seriously, wtf?

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Nero Fiddles While Rome Burns

So while America faces it's own implosion here's what the white house has been dedicating resources and time to.

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Has anyone in this administration EVER heard of optics?

Please Obama, don't be late.

Holiday Eating Tips

This was forwarded to me and I enjoyed it:

HOLIDAY EATING TIPS

1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they're serving rum balls.

2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly. It's rare.. You cannot find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's not as if you're going to turn into an eggnog-alcoholic or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it. Have one for me. Have two. It's later than you think. It's Christmas!

3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That's the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.

4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they're made with skim milk or whole milk. If it's skim, pass. Why bother? It's like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.

5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello?

6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year's. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you'll need after circling the buffet table while
carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.

7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They're like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.

8. Same for pies. Apple, Pumpkin, Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?

9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it's loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean, have some standards.

10. One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven't been paying attention. Re-read tips; start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner.

Happy Holidays

Seriously, What The Hell Is Wrong With You - Volume 1 Issue 2

There is so much going on here that I can't believe it.

http://toronto.en.craigslist.ca/tor/emd/952692684.html

I love the part where he sells you some old cassettes meritoriously based on content. That's awesome!!

Satriani v. Coldplay

Too often musicians are accused of ripping off other artists in their compositions. However in the case of the recent hub ub about Coldplay borrowing from Satriani, it's a hard to argue.

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Do I think that Coldplay has ever heard this song in their life? No. What I think we have here is what legal types would call simulataneous or logical discovery.

When it comes to pop music, sometimes when you hear "furry", "wet nose" and "barks" you think DOG. By this I mean the forms are so well formed that when you have two chords the third is sometimes implied. When you have 3 sometimes a fourth seems 'right'...before you know it you've got the same progression.

That being said, Satriani was first past the post and by rights he did create this clearly pleasing melody...first. Just because Coldplay didn't know that doesn't mean they're entitled to a license free use.

Patent law says that if I event something that already exists, it's not my idea because I didn't know it did.

I feel bad for Colplay, I really do. It's every musicians nightmare to get hung on somemthing like this...and so obviously so.

It happens.

Now if you'll excuse me I am going to go write New Kid In Town for the 50th time.

Seriously, What The Hell Is Wrong With You - Volume 1 Issue 1

Today's issue was inspired by this: http://toronto.en.craigslist.ca/tor/hsh/952088910.html

Are you serious? Is it worth the to place the ad, deal with the responses and have the kind of person coming to your house that buys $8 (regularly $12)?

You have to be kidding!

I guess that's how you afford a place, supposedly in The Beach.

Saxby Chambliss Gropes Granddaughter in Ad

As a person who produces videos and as a person who follows politics closely I am truly baffled to come up with a scenario whereby this got missed by EVERYONE WHO WATCHED IT. My God.

AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWKWARD!:

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How much does Georgia hate democrats when your opponent runs this ad and you still lose. Wow.

When The Long Walk To Equality Ends...Stop Walking.

A long time peeve of mine is the concept of "reverse" racism and the like. By extension a recent attack on a lesbian couple in Oshawa has got me thinking a long the same lines. Here's the story in case you didn't know.




--story starts here---

Lesbian couple attacked outside Oshawa school


Man charged after women punched as classes let out
Nov 08, 2008 - 04:30 AM

By Stefanie Swinson

OSHAWA -- Anji Dimitriou has a black eye days after she was attacked in front her children’s school. She says her vision is still blurry and the shock is still sinking in.

Ms. Dimitriou, 30, and her lesbian partner Jane Currie, 37, said Friday they still can’t believe what happened.

“He clocked me right in the face, like right in the side of my face, and I hit my truck and I couldn’t see anything, like I blacked out,” Ms. Dimitriou said.

“I was awake but I could hear everything but I just couldn’t see anything. Then I think he clocked me again right in the top of my head.”

Classes had just let out Monday at Gordon B. Attersley elementary school on Attersley Drive, according to the couple.

Ms. Dimitriou said she was helping her son put his backpack into the car when another student’s father came toward her and began yelling.

He referred to her and Ms. Currie as men, she said, as she recounted what happened.

Ms. Currie said the man swore at her, called her a slang word for lesbian in an aggressive and derogatory way, then “out of nowhere” spit in her face and punched her.

Ms. Currie saw what was happening and rushed over.

“I had said to him, ‘you a--hole what are you doing? You just beat a woman’ (then) bang I got it” she said.

The punch split Ms. Currie’s cheek and her bloody face can be seen in a photo taken by a witness as she and Ms. Dimitriou waited for an ambulance. It took four stitches to close the wound, Ms. Currie said.

According to the couple, it was clear they were attacked because they’re lesbians.

Alacea Brown, an eyewitness whose children also attend the school, said the attack was unprovoked.

“I could not believe that someone would do this right in the middle of a whole bunch of children in school," Ms. Brown said.

She intervened along with another parent despite the shock of seeing what happened.

“There was children everywhere," said Ms. Brown, noting a pregnant bus driver nearby was terrified. They didn't know who might be attacked next, she said.

The saddest part for the couple, still recovering from their own injuries, is the lasting impact it might have on their 6-year-old son and the other children who were just a few feet away.

“Kids were screaming. Little kids. It happened right where kids go to get on the school bus. They were so afraid,” Ms. Currie said as she began to cry.

“You try and explain that to your kids,” said Ms. Currie. “They’re petrified. So scared they can’t sleep at night.”

Durham Regional Police Sgt. Paul McCurbin said Mark Scott, 43, of Oshawa faces two charges of assault causing bodily harm in connection with the incident.

Mr. Scott will make his first court appearance on December 16.

School officials said a “no trespass” order has also been issued by the school.

--article ends here--

Now from this came a great movement of speeches, facebook pages, protests, petitions and rallies in Oshawa. Now if you're me, you're asking, I hope, What are they protesting? Did some cracker police department refuse to press charges? Nope, he was clearly arrested. Did some homophobic Crown Attorney refuse to proceed? Nope, they don't care that gay people were involved. They're going to totally prosecute the man and he'll very likely go to jail. Rightfully so...but not because he assaulted a gay person, because he assaulted a person.
With respect and compassion to the victims. I am no more sad for them than I am any other victims of crime. All crimes are hate crimes. When one person takes hands upon another some part of our society has failed and that is always sad. I think that's what true acceptance is. I don't see sexual orientation in their being victims, I see people who were victimized and they should have the full resources of the justice system made available to them. Just like everyone else...no less...but also no more.

Therein lies the area no one wants to really talk about. True equality, not over compensating with over response. Society at large has literal and figurative blood on its hands as a result of our attitudes of the past. However, we sometimes think that over responding tomorrow will atone for the deeds of yesterday... and it won't. When we stop putting sexuality as the prefix on every issue involving persons in a minority orientation situation then we have acceptance, then we have true equality.

Now of course, the very obvious motive as illustrated in the accused words make it almost impossible to ignore but I have to ask. Why does it matter? Since when do we care that much about why the person did it? Generally, motive is considered to the extent of determining if the person had a reason for doing what they did not as mitigating factor in how we react. We can by all means be disappointed and angry when we see these evolutionary hold-outs but we should at the end of the day equally appalled by all attacks.

I worry that in our well intentioned desire to be hyper inclusive and opposed to so called 'hate crimes' we are creating a class system of victim. If a woman is randomly attacked tonight for "no reason" I cannot look her in the eye and tell here there are more important victims.

With that in mind I wonder how many of the protestors would be rallying in support of prostitutes who are raped and beaten or homeless people who are violated with dramatically more frequency than that of the Oshawa gay community. And to be clear,
I find all of these things repugnant. They should all be prosecuted and opposed with similar vigour. Isn’t anything else judging a victim by their sexuality? And haven’t we agreed that we’re against that?

Greatest Rap Battle of All Time!

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